M.I.A.

what if i don't!?!
there's stats out on pregnancy and birth rates. who's having babies, where are they having them and how old are they when they have them.

as par for the course... i am behind schedule. the average woman has her first child at 25. while i see myself as someone that thoroughly enjoys the life i am leading and finds joy in doing for others and knows that life has a lot in store for me- i continue to feel selfish for not wanting to have children. i want to pay off my student loans- not purchase diapers. i want to get in and do well in graduate school (eventually- given i find the courage to take the GRE)- not research the best day care at an equitable price. i want to teach a feminist theory to young budding minds in an academic setting- not teach my child that "no.. no.. hands are not for hitting!" or one better- "no.. no.. kitties do not go in the dryer!" better still- "no.. no.. fashion magazines will only make you feel fat!"

and only to lend to the feeling of selfish is what i came across today. that there was a mass sterilization of thousands by the government! it pains me to think about my life with children and for many more, it is equally as painful to imagine their life without children and thanks to the government at large- that harsh reality is theirs:

State Secret: Thousands Secretly Sterilized

Riddick was raped and became pregnant at the age of 13. Social workers labeled her promiscuous and too feeble-minded to ever be a responsible parent. So, after giving birth in 1968, Riddick was sterilized without being told.
She learned the truth years later, when she married and tried to have more children.
"They took so much away from me," Riddick said. "They took away my spirit and my soul."
North Carolina sterilized close to 8,000 women in hospitals across the state.

i have claimed for sometime that i had yet to meet a man man enough to make me want to have kids. and i guess that's still true, but man or no man at least the government hasn't exhiled my eggs--- selfish be damned, i'm barren- BY MY OWN CHOICE!

This entry was posted on Sunday, May 15, 2005 at 7:21 PM. You can skip to the end and leave a response.